How do you deal with a less than lovely wife?

This is not original. I got this from Dr. Laura Schlessinger's website. I felt so bad for this guy and promised myself I would never let myself get this crabby.

How Do You Deal With A Less Than Lovely Wife


Dr Laura:

Upon hearing some advice you gave a caller the other day, I decided to pull out all the stops for my wife.

Knowing she had to work a little late a few nights ago, I decided to get a bag of Hershey kisses; line them from the garage door, where I knew she would enter, and line them all the way to the bedroom where I would be waiting (clothed: ready for anything she may want to engage in but not pressuring) ready to give her a big kiss when she walked in the room. I had prepared some snacks and had a bottle of wine and was ready to rub her feet and let her talk to me about her day.

She walks in, I am so nervous and giddy from my preparation, and she slowly makes her way through the candlelight-Hershey kiss path and into the room.

I say, "welcome home honey; sorry you had a long day" and give her a little kiss. So used to being a grump, her first comment is "how many of these Hershey kisses did you eat in the process?" and walks into her closet to get undressed. Dressed in her Muumuu she comes back out. I offer to get her a drink, perhaps a glass of wine, and she says, "I can't drink, I have to work tomorrow" I offer her anything in the world she wants to drink, whether that be a Slurpee at 7-11 or a Starbucks Frappucino. She says she is not thirsty and plops herself at her computer. She then keeps looking at the Hershey path and says, "are you cleaning this up, or me?" I easily clean up the path in less then 60 seconds and retire to my room. 5 minutes later I come out of the bedroom to see her getting a diet coke from the fridge.

I just don't know how to make her happy anymore.